thoughts about children

My whole life, I was always the girl who couldn't wait to have babies. 

Or to be pregnant. 

Or to be a mom. The whole shebang basically. 

Then Christian and I got married, and the whole baby-making possibility got 100%  real, and I suddenly lost my zest for having children and the whole thing kinda just started freaking me out really. 

I'll be totally honest, I've been so happy this last year and 3 months just having Christian to myself. 

Then, on top of it all, I've had tons child care jobs for the last year and a half.

First I worked at a group home for troubled teenage girls. 

Then I worked at a summer camp.

Then I was a nanny. 

Now we babysit our lives away, 

AND we are primary teachers.

Let me tell you something:

That shiz is GREAT birth control.

However, as I sat in primary yesterday and watched my favorite sunbeam Logan gasp in excitement as his dad walked in the room, 

(Oh my gosh, DAAAAADDD!)

I suddenly got very excited to have crazy little blonde children with Christian.

Like this one.

Or this one.

Because let's be real, it's going to be so fun to watch them say the most ridiculous things, get excited over disney movies, wrestle the heck out of their dad, and fall asleep in their dinners.

Especially to watch them fall asleep in their dinners.